fair warning: just a little bit of my heart here.

sometimes we have to “let go”. We can’t hold onto everything, we can’t control everything, we can’t make everything perfect and we for sure can’t be perfect ourselves. something i’ve found to be helpful is to work on “letting go” through art. Let me show you what i mean…

above is a pretty crappy/fake/amature-no really modern :) looking painting of the Effle Tower. Most people would look at this and say-“um… you call yourself an artist? or an architect? did you learn nothing in your 5 years of schooling?”

i created this piece when i was working on my senior thesis for my Masters of Architecture. it was a stressful semester…year…everything. one day, i was so stressed that i just left school early. i know. i’m not that kind of girl! i skipped! what? basically I couldn’t take it anymore. I was getting no where with my thesis and i was stressed.

so i got home and pulled out a blank canvas. really i just needed to explode! so i exploded through paint. the process was healing. peace giving. theraputic.  in my mind, i went to Paris and was in a bed room with a beautiful wrought iron door & porch overlooking the Effle tower. i prayed through my painting.  i didn’t care that nothing was coming out perfect, i just put paint on a canvas. i just made lines and splotches work together to form what i was feeling in my heart. 

now, every time i look at that painting, all i can think of is peace. Am i embarrassed when some of my art friends come to my home and see my “amature” piece? sometimes. i mean- my friends are very good at art. i’m always impressed by them. I have never seen an amature piece in their homes. but then i think- what the heck? i’m an architect-i’m an artist too- sometimes i see things more abstractly. sometimes i just have to get things out, no matter how good they are, i shouldn’t hide them- i found peace through this piece of work.

anyway. a couple weeks ago i had that need to find peace again. to pray my way through a piece of art work.  i needed to let go.

i let go of the idea of perfection.

 i let go the stresses i was feeling from work.

 i let go hurt i was feeling from others.

 i was letting go of a hard and lonely week.

and i was letting go of the fact that i can not do it all.

so here is my story:

i made 2 of these! i was really feeling stressed. but through the imperfection the process was very theraputic :)

so then i had to figure out what to do with them. i remembed that i had a couple of old manuscripts that i had bought for husbuddy at an antique store but still hadn’t framed. so… i had backgrounds. yay!

here they are now framed and gorgeous above the computer over my husbuddy’s “theology corner” :)

and a couple close ups of the background which fades away because the manuscript is just that cool. i love the little images! and the writing. and the lines that they used to write in straight lines! eek! love it!

so, tell me. am i totally crazy? or have you had a similar experience through the art of letting go?